(do I really have to spell it out that this image is from Google? Is someone out there really thinking I may have actually taken this picture myself and photoshopped it into a DVD cover? Really? Okay f ine. It’s from Google. Happy?)
I’m sooo tired today. Don’t expect much from me. I had one of the worst sleeps ever last night.
Allow me to explain.
As you know, Willie’s out of town on business. Whenever one of us is away, the boys always like to sleep with the parent that remains. Which, frankly, we enjoy. Snuggling their warm, soft, quiet little bodies through the night is one of the joys of parenthood.
But of course they both want it to be their turn. And it’s really hard to say “yes” to one and “no” to the other. Because that means someone’s going to be left out and unhappy. So I agreed they could BOTH sleep with me last night. We have a king sized bed, so I figured the three of us could easily fit.
They went to bed first, and when it was my turn, I quietly slipped under the covers in between them. It was a Mommy Sandwich and I was the meat – as they like to say. Which I don’t particularly think is all that flattering, but I’m sure they mean it in the very best way. Don’t they? Don’t they? Anyway, I happily drifted off to sleep.
Until The Eldest and his legs of steel made an appearance at about 2am.
I’m a very very deep sleeper, and yet I was vaguely aware that I was being kicked and pushed by two incredibly strong legs. Suddenly the middle spot I had carved out for myself had become more of a sliver than a spot.
I drowsily pushed him back. He pushed harder. Every time I moved his legs, they’d reappear – heavier and stronger than before.
After about an hour of this I seem to remember some very harsh words escaping my lips that sounded something like “STOP IT! GET OFF ME! I’M NEVER SLEEPING WITH YOU AGAIN!” Words that may or may not have been accompanied by a quick left handed punch to his upper thigh. I have no excuse. I was in a sleep induced haze. I regretted it immediately.
At this point I decided to just throw in the towel and take my leave. I headed off to his room, which was sitting vacant, and found a quiet, peaceful bed to lie down in. It was now 3am.
But guess who came wondering into his room looking for me at 4am? Guess who had had a bad dream? Guess who proceeded to climb into his bed with me? Sigh.
I wonder if his bad dream had something to do with a crazy woman yelling and punching while he innocently slept . . .
Do you like sleeping with your kids or not? Should I be offended at being called “the meat”? Was I justified in my late night tirade? Could I have psychologically scarred my son? This are all important questions people. Leave me answers.
17 Responses to “Meat + Kicking = Tired”
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May 13th, 2010 at 5:56 am
Being called “the meat” isn’t a bad thing….. I’ve been called much worse!!! Any-hoo, don’t worry about your late night temporary insanity, its only natural, happens to the best of us. Now if it happens during the day when you are completley(I use the word loosley) sane ,then you have something to worry about!!! I’m full of great advice. call me any-time!! Cheers!!
May 13th, 2010 at 9:49 am
I don’t think being called the meat is bad. Isn’t that the best part of the sandwich? I do, however, hate sleeping with the kids. When he was two he was a bed hog and a kicker. I can’t even imagine how terrible it would be at older ages.
May 13th, 2010 at 11:34 am
I don’t think I could ever do it, but then again I’m not a parent yet and that might change. What I do know is that my husband and I absolutely must always only have a king sized bed because I hate to be touched when I’m sleeping. I also take up the whole bed and leave him about three inches on his side. Sometimes I wonder how he loves me so much.
May 13th, 2010 at 11:47 am
Oh man, what a treat it was to sleep in my mom’s bed when my dad was out of town. My brother and I had to take turns though because they only had a double. I don’t think I was a kicker though… snorer and cover thief, but definitely not a kicker.
May 13th, 2010 at 2:58 pm
Grayson sleeps with us. I know. I know. He likes to be pressed right up against me at all times. We also have a king sized bed and I will be right against the edge. But I love that cuddle bug
May 13th, 2010 at 2:59 pm
What a fun, and cute blog you have here. I’m a first time visitor, just became a follower, and love what you wrote about google images. So funny! I hate going to the trouble linking up every photo I use. Can’t I just say that all my images are GOOGLE images and be done with it, haha. Well, not ALL my images I guess, I do post a lot of my own too.
Anyway, I know what you mean about having the kids in the bed with you. I can never sleep when they sleep with us. It’s so uncomfortable!
May 13th, 2010 at 4:11 pm
okay, i’m sorry, i can’t get past that picture. those look like women’s legs to me. a little hairy at the bottom but still.
i’m not even kidding, i used to do my mom’s VHS tape “buns of steel” video. she still has it at her house.
when i have kids i’m considering locking them in their bedrooms at night. i will have an emergency button in case of real emergencies. too much?
Cher
Replied:
May 13th, 2010 at 4:19 pm
Not at all. In fact, one of the better ideas I’ve heard in awhile.
May 13th, 2010 at 4:54 pm
You are definitely justified in your late night tirade.
Whether it’s your kids or the neighbours dog, nothing should be allowed to interfere with your sleep. Sleep is one of the most valueable things in life.
Sleep is so wonderful in fact, I often sit at work daydreaming about being at home and sleeping.
May 13th, 2010 at 6:18 pm
My 4 year old kicks me sometimes when he crawls into my bed in the middle of the night. Just pushing and squishing and kicking. Drives me NUTS.
May 14th, 2010 at 4:42 am
This made me laugh. Thank you. I love cuddling with my girls. Haven’t been kicked yet. But you wouldn’t think a four year could take up so much room.
May 14th, 2010 at 1:46 pm
Aura will not sleep with us. From time to time, she will claim that she wants to, but then will lie there chatting incessantly. (“Wow, look at your ceiling fan!” “Wow, look at this blanket!” “Wow, Mommy, do you remember that episode of ‘Imagination Movers’ where Scott was having a bad hair day and no one could get the hair to stop sticking up and did I tell you the firetruck came to preschool and I like M&Ms much more than peanut butter cups and and and and”OHGODSOMEONESAVEME)
So I have little advice for you on the sleeping thing. On being meat, however: Yes, take offense, definitely. Cheese is much more ladylike, or even a good handful of sprouts or lettuce.
May 14th, 2010 at 2:32 pm
ugh. i have a dog that does the same thing to me. kicks me, pushes me, i wake up with his stinky dog feet in my face. i think i would rather sleep with kids…
May 14th, 2010 at 3:30 pm
I think it really depends what kind of meat you are. Ham? Not so bad. salami? Yeah, be insulted.
I used to love love love sleeping with my babies. Now they are the biggest bed hogs on the face of the planet.
May 15th, 2010 at 8:34 am
I can’t sleep with my kids. My “Mommy mode” kicks in and then I can’t sleep. I do however LOVE snuggling in bed with them. After a good night’s sleep….without them, lol!
May 16th, 2010 at 4:15 am
Mine are small girls, and yet they manage to take up an inordinate area of space when they join us, and also wriggle. A lot!
May 16th, 2010 at 10:33 pm
Our little man actually sleeps better without us. He likes snugs in our bed…but when he’s sleep, he wants his crib!