First things first – I have yet to announce the winner of my Blog Birthday animal books contest.  The contest closed last Tuesday and my excuse is pure laziness.  But www.random.org and I did do the draw last night and the winner is . . . Mimi from Living in France!  Yay - I’m so glad another Mom of boys won!  Hope your guys enjoy them Mimi!

Secondly, I feel that I’ve been cheating on my blog lately.  That I’ve been giving more love and affection to Twitter and Google Reader than I’ve been giving to “The Only Girl”.  And I’m starting to feel guilty about it.  And also annoyed with myself. 

Here’s what happens – I intend to write a blog post, so I fire up my computer.  But before I start writing I figure I should check my email, then catch up on Twitter and my Reader.  And by the time that all happens, at least an hour has gone by and any quiet writing time I had has long since expired or I’m too tired.  So a post doesn’t get written. 

But isn’t the point of having a blog to WRITE POSTS?!  Yes.  Of course it is.  Then why am I getting sidetrack with all the other stuff?!  Because the other stuff is easier?  Because the other stuff doesn’t involve much thinking, only reading?  Probably.

But that’s not how I intended it to be when I started out.  So when my little blog celebrated it’s 1st birthday last week, I got to thinking about what I really want from it.  And the answer was not “all the other stuff”.  I want to connect with other people by writing and I want to enjoy doing it.  Some of my writing might be good, a lot of my writing will be bad, but writing is the whole point.

So that’s what I’m going to try to concentrate a little harder on.  Sure – I’ll still be on Twitter, just maybe not quite so much.  Of course I’ll still be reading all your posts, I’m just not going to worry if I get a few days behind in my Reader.  In fact on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays (the days I’ve committed to post each week) I’m not even going to open my Reader or Twitter until I’ve written a  post.  Or at least I’ll try really, really hard not to.

Do you sometimes feel like you’re ”cheating” on your blog or am I the only one with no willpower?  What’s your strategy for getting your posts written?

I like spam – really I do!  Spam can be very interesting.  Although I do use Akismet to filter it out so that my readers don’t have to deal with it, I must admit that I read it all.

Do you how many different products are sold through spam?!  A lot.  That’s how many.  These spammers have nothing on the telemarketers!

Spam also helps you expand your knowledge of different languages.  Sometimes, I can’t even figure out for the life of me what language a particular sales pitch is in.

And who knew that there are so many Spammers in the world?  Have I missed that boat on a new career?  Are these people quietly pulling in the big bucks?  Should I be looking into a spamming course for myself?

But mostly I find that spam is polite.  And sometimes helpful.  Like this lovely message I received the other day. . .

“If you’re in a not good position and have got no cash to go out from that, you would require to take the loans.  Just because it would aid you for sure.  I take short term loan every year and feel myself great because of that.”

First of all, how brave of this unknown person to admit to me that he/she has been experiencing financial troubles.  Very brave indeed.

And yes – I think I WOULD like to “take the loans” because I would also like to “feel myself great”.  Thank you SO much!  This is exactly what I’ve been looking for.  All this time I thought it was The Chocolate or The New Clothes or maybe even The Sleep that would make me feel great.  Turns out it’s simply The Loans.

I think I just might email this guy back.

Do you read your spam or just hit delete?  What’s your favourite spammy product pitch?  Got any good product ideas for when I launch my spam company?

So today I’m continuing with Tips & Hints for Blogging (you can read Part 1 here – if you care).  And I will repeat  . . . these items can, in no way, be considered expert advice.  It’s just a collection of stuff that bugs me.  But if it bugs me, it likely bugs others, so you should know about it.

Also keep in mind that I don’t use Blogger/Blogspot.  I self-host on Wordpress (and I love Wordpress for those that were wondering), so I’m somewhat unfamiliar with the way Blogger blogs work.  But that being said . . . here’s the next 4 things that bug me.  Fix them and you’ll likely attract more readers.

Let’s start where we left off;

5)  Please strip your blog of blinking, flashing, fancy things.  They are akin to covering your Cadillac with hideous bumper stickers.  No one can appreciate the fine blog Cadillac you’re driving around in because they’re too distracted by all the bling.  We don’t stop by your blog to see bling.  We stop by to read something that in some way, entertains, educates or bring us together.  Buttons from your favourites sites or photos that you love?  No problem.  Just keep them displayed together and organized in a visually pleasing manner.  Please.

6)  If you list your blogroll/favourite sites on your home page, and you have sites on it that indicate a Bloggers last post was, oh I don’t know, 6 months ago or more, it might be time to remove it.  It’s likely that person isn’t blogging anymore.  And you look silly for recommending them as one of your “favourites”.  I know it’s hard to keep up with these things.  It’s a boring and mundane task.  But I also think it’s worth it.

7)  The “comment will be visible after approval” thing fools us into thinking we’re the first commenter, then tricks us into thinking “hey – where did my comment go!?” before we notice that darn auto message.  SO annoying.  I think I would rather have word verification.  And I hate word verification.  But it just might be the lesser of the two evils.  I do understand that there are mean commenters out there that you might be trying to intercept.  So I realize that this is a hard one.  But I’m just saying – I, as the writer of this blog -  hate “comment will be visible after approval”.  Do with that what you will.

8)  You simply can NOT have a paragraph that’s over 3″ long.  In fact, I would suggest that 2″ be the limit.  I’m presently lobbying to have a law put into place that says so, because long paragraphs are just ridiculous.  And boring.  You MUST find a way to break them up.  At all costs.

Okay.  That’s all.  I’ve said my peace.  And again I ask you;

What do YOU think?  Am I bang on or totally off base?  Did I miss one of YOUR pet peeves?

Even though I  haven’t been blogging for long, I have discovered some stuff along the way, so today’s post is Part I of my blogging “Tips & Hints”.  Please keep in mind that these items can, in no way, be considered expert advice.  It’s just a collection of stuff that bugs me.  But if it bugs me, it likely bugs others, so you should know about it.

Also keep in mind that I don’t use Blogger.  I self-host on Wordpress (and I love Wordpress for those that were wondering), so I’m somewhat unfamiliar with the way Blogger blogs work.  But that being said . . . here’s the first 4 things that bug me.  Fix them and you’ll likely attract more readers.

1)  You can not have both “word verification” AND “your comment will appear after blog owner approval” on at the same time.  That’s just overkill.  Really annoying overkill.  It’s one or the other people!  If you make it too difficult or annoying for people to leave comments – they won’t bother.

Even though both are highly annoying, I do understand your need to rid the universe of spam.  But your blog really isn’t so valuable that it has to be locked up tight like Fort Knox, now is it?  So what if the occasional spam gets through?  We all get it too – no biggie.  Just delete it when you notice it.

Personally, I use the Akismet plugin, and it does a really nice job of setting aside about 99.9% of the spam I get.  And frankly, besides being annoying, spam can also be amusing.  In fact I did a whole post about a spammy comment I received the other day.

2)  Please don’t have your blog rigged to start auto playing music.  I really don’t care what music you like – I’m there to read what you have to say.  And since I do most of my blog reading at work, my boss doesn’t appreciate it either.

3)  Keep your background plain and simple.  No crazy patterns or designs please, and no black background with coloured font.  It makes it VERY difficult to read.  And if it’s difficult to read, people won’t bother.  Keep it clean and simple.

4)  I’m a visual person.  I like to see a picture of you.  Even if it’s just the standard one you use for you avatar.  It helps me put a face to the blog.  And when you seem like a real person to me, you seem more like a “friend”.  Which means I’ll read you.  Now, I do know that some of you have identity issues.  Fine – I understand that.  So pick a little cartoon person, or use your neighbour’s photo or something.  Just give me a picture to associate with you and your blog.

What do you think – am I bang on or totally off base?  Got any other pet peeves you want me to include in Part II?

I’m sorry, but you’ll have to tune in on Tuesday for my Oscar Party details.

Sheesh – you’re so demanding!  I was up watching the show till the wee hours.  Do you people want a quality post or not?  Okay then.  You’ll just have to wait.  It will be worth it.  There will be pictures.  I’m just saying.

————————————————————————————————————————————

Blogging can be hard work.

It’s often difficult to come up with something witty or meaningful day after day.  You can get easily discouraged.  Sometimes you wonder “is it really worth it?”  or “what the heck am I trying to accomplish here?” sometimes even “should I go on?”

But then you get a comment.  A comment from one of your Readers like this one I received the other day;

“i very adore all your writing style, very useful.  don’t quit and also keep penning due to the fact it simply just good worth to read it, looking forward to looked over a whole lot more of your current web content, goodbye!”

And suddenly . . . it’s all worth it again.

Thank you Asian Spammer.  You’ve given me, and probably the thousands of other Bloggers you sent this same message to, a reason to go on.

Thank you.

Well, well, well . . . all you Readers might be really good at reading blogs and writing blogs, and leaving witty comments, but it appears that you all SUCK in the technical blog design department.  Most specifically, the correction of disappearing sidebars.  Not one of you could come up with a solution to my problem (this one here).  Very, very disappointing.  Apparently you only specialize in the Funny.

But in a moment of clarity, I had an idea.  I had seen the same blog design firm’s button on several of the sites I read, so I fired off an email to Bloggy Blog Designz describing my rather unpleasant sidebar situation.

And what to my wondering eyes should appear only a few hours later????

A very delightful email back from the very knowledgeable Jenna describing what she thinks the problem might be and how to fix it.

And she was bang on!  Bang on I tell you!

And since I now know that none of you are very technical, I’m going to grab this opportunity to  make myself sound much more brilliant than I really am.  Ready?

You see, it turns out the problem was the result of an open <div> tag in the html of a post I did a week ago.  Actually (more impressive techy talk coming . . . ) the open tag was embedded in the poll plugin I used.  ha ha ha!  Can you believe that?!  An silly old open tag!  Who knew!

As promised, I gave the solver of the problem her choice of prizes from my list.  And she’s going with “a shout out and link on my soon-to-be-fixed sidebar for a week”.

So that’s where you will find Bloggy Blog Designz for the next 7 days.  Over there, on the upper right of my page.  Just click her button to get to her site.  Give her a visit, check her out.  Treat yourself to a little somethin’ somethin’.

I, on the other hand, am going to sleep like a baby tonight knowing that all is right with The Only Girl again.  Thanks for nothin’ Bloggies.

Okay.  Now I’ve really done it.  I’ve broken my blog.  I don’t know how and I don’t know when, but it’s definitely broken.

When you land on www.TheOnlyGirl.com or click on “Home” across the top of my page, you will notice that my sidebar disappears from the right side of my screen and jumps down, way, way down, to the very bottom of the page.  And YET!  If you click on any of the other pages across the top (Meet Me, Email Me, etc.) or on a specific blog post, you will see that the sidebar comes back to the right side where it belongs.

But why is it hiding on my “Home” page???  Why oh WHYYYYYY?  (shakes fist to the heavens in sheer and utter frustration)

I’m reasonably technical – like maybe a 7 out of 10 – but this one has me stumped and I’ve spent far too much time trying to figure it out.  So I’m putting out a proposal to all you clever Bloggies.  Desperate times call for desperate measures.

If you can solve my problem, or at least refer me to someone you know that can, I’m willing to offer up a reward.  You can have your choice of any one of the following;

• a shout out and link on my soon-to-be-fixed sidebar for a week
• full use of our backyard ice rink for the remainder of the winter
• 5″ x 7″ colour picture of me and my Haley Ga
• a blog award to display anyway you please
• loan of my pink feather boa for the month of March
• my ticket to the Olympics Closing Ceremony

(okay, maybe I’m lying about the last one, but all the others are for real)

Okay – I’m waiting.  I’ll be checking my email all day.  Help me.  Puh-leeze.  I’m begging you.  Begging.  Can’t you hear my desperation?

This business with the “LOL”, I think it’s a bit out of control.  I feel it’s been highly over used.  I understand the concept, but honestly, how often is it when you type LOL, you really did LOL?  Were you really sitting there at your computer actually laughing out loud?  HA HA HA!  To no one in particular?  No, I doubt it.

I think we need to revisit this particular abbreviation.  Maybe have something else that can be used.  Like “CTM” (chuckled to myself)?  Or perhaps “SOTI”? (smiling on the inside)?  How about “TMMS” (that made me smirk)?  Because that’s usually what I do when I read something really funny.  I chuckle.  I smile.  I smirk.  But I don’t actually LOL.

I’m not sure exactly who I need to submit a new alternative to in order for it to be considered - Google?  Wikipedia?  Bill Gates?  Don’t know, but I’m willing to get to the bottom of it.

Got any other new abbreviation suggestions for me?  And in the meantime, consider it a compliment if I leave “CTM” in the comments of your blog.  Because you’ll know that you actually DID make me chuckle to myself.