Okay – just had to get that out of the way.

Why?  Because I’m really excited.  Nervous, yes.  But mainly, really excited.

What could possibly have The Only Girl so excited?

An adventure.  That’s what.

I’m composing this post on Thursday afternoon.  As I sit on an airplane.  BY MYSELF PEOPLE!  Because I’m en route to one hell of a Girl’s Weekend.

Where you may ask?

Hold on tight.  Are you ready for this one???

I’m flying from Toronto to Boston.  To meet these people, who just so happen to be a few of my most favourite Bloggers;

•  Monique from A Day in the Life of a Surferwife
• Jessalyn from Cape Code Awesome
• Kate from Then Again Kate

I know!

And on Saturday night we are going to see the show of this person;

(Chelsea Handler) 

Apparently she’s a famous comedian.  I’ve read about her on many of your blogs, but honestly?  We don’t get her show in Canada, so no one up here really knows who she is.  I’ve been YouTubing her like crazy this week in preparation, but am slightly afraid that I’m not quite up to speed.  AND we have backstage passes!

I KNOW!

No, us Bloggers have never met before.  Well, at least not outside of the safe confines of the Webz.  And yet we know so much about each other.  But meet we will.  Tonight.  Gulp.

Can I just tell you how nerve-racking the thought of meeting these girls in person has been?  Granted, I just decided to join this little weekend meet-up barely over 1 week ago.  A very last minute and impulsive decision for The Only Girl.  She’s is not good with such things.  She likes to plan.  A lot.  Allow me to peel back the curtains of my mind and let you in on what the past week has been like. 

• What was I thinking?
• How can I quickly lose 5 pounds?
• I change my mind!  I’m not going!
• These boys are driving me crazy – how many more days?
• What to pack . . . what to pack?
• Crap – I need to get a mani, pedi and hair cut before I go!
• What if I don’t like them?  What if they don’t like me?
• What if we sit in awkward silence most of the weekend?
• I’ll be one of the few people who actually gets to see what the elusive Kate looks like
• Can the boys be trusted by themselves?  Surely they know to have the house back in order before I arrive home, right? (note: this was a cryptic reminder meant solely for Willie. Hi Honey!  Miss you!)
• Chilling on The Cod – Jessalyn style!
•  I am physically unable to poop outside my home base.  This means no poop for 3 days.  If you should see pictures of me where I appear quite bloated or slightly pregnant, please know it’s the poop.
• Generally, I’m unable to stay awake past 11:30.  I am sure to be the party pooper.
• Oh – Margaritas with Surferwife!  Inventor of the Celebrity Encounter Margarita Barometer!  How cool will THAT be?!

As you can see, I’ve been riding the crazy horse of emotions.  But now it’s too late.  I’m on the plane and the meet-up is eminent.  Wish me luck.

Be sure to visit their blogs to see what they have to say!

I was on vacation all week with my boys.  And it’s bittersweet that it has come to an end.  I’ll miss them terribly today as I enter my fluorescent cubby farm all by myself, but sometimes too much of a good thing is, well, enough.  It was a busy but fun week that included;

• a soccer tournament
• a pool party
• The Eldest’s 10th birthday.  TEN!  sigh . . . it seems like only yesterday that traumatic, emergency c-section took place.  Have I never mention that?  hmm.  Maybe some other time.
• a very special birthday party for my BFF (that I’ll tell you about in another post)
• 2.5 days at a friend’s cottage, which included campfires, a beach day, frog hunting & awesome sunsets

• an ear infection (for The Youngest) whilst at the cottage and away from civilization that had him crying and up many times in the night.  For 3 nights.  Heartbreaking really.  And detrimental to my precious sleep.  Which isn’t good for anybody.
• a 5 hour trip & wait at the hospital in cottage town for said ear infection.  FIVE HOURS!  For an EAR INFECTION!  I’m used to our fab local medical walk-in centre that gets you in and out in less than 30 minutes.
• a day trip to see some natural scenic caves, which I’ll admit, were very cool!

• one night’s stay at a hotel which included swimming, dinner out and an impromtu family Connect Four tournament.  Apparently I suck at Connect Four.
• a trip to our local medical walk-in centre once we got home from the cottage because the ear infection still hadn’t settled down.  And yes, we were in and out in less than 30 minutes.
• the Toronto FC vs. FC Dallas MLS soccer game.  Where it POURED rain the entire time.  No, our seats were not covered, thanks for asking.  Other than when I’m in the pool or the shower, I’ve never been so wet.  I’d like to think that my brave face covered up my very unhappy one.

Now, what you might notice from this vacation list is that a) we did a lot  b) we had a good time  c) we spent A LOT of time in the car and d) almost all activities were geared toward the male population of my house.

Which is why I also made a big decision last week.  An impulsive decision.  One that will help to re-balance the lack of girliness in my life.  One that will take me somewhere I’ve never been before and one that has left me feeling nervous all weekend.

It’s also one that I’m REALLY excited about!  I’m not quite ready to reveal it . . . yet.  But soon.  Very, very soon!

I may also be itching numerous bug bites, picking roasted marshmallows of out short peoples hair, getting my butt kicked at Crazy 8’s or Connect Four, and refereeing daily arguments, but I prefer to focus on the positive.

I’ll be returning on July 26th.  I’m expecting the week will produce some blog fodder, so you may want to come back and find out how I survived.

Till then, I leave you with these pictures of my destination from last year.  I’m expecting it to look exactly the same.

Please leave me a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I return.

Beep Beep Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep . . . .

I had intended to do a vlog last night and get the boys to help me do the draw, but then I went out for all-you-can-eat sushi with my BFF and another girlfriend.  After I managed to drag my so-full-I-could-puke-and-there’s-no-way-they-made-any-money-off-of-me ass home, I discovered there were 3 men and 5 boys in my backyard.  So that idea was out the window.

Instead, I opted to watch Big Brother go to bed in an effort to ignore the raw fish rumblings in my stomach, get some much needed sleep, and deal with selecting a winner this morning.

So . . . I made a list of everyone’s names.  Your name appeared once for every entry you were eligible for.  Some people had their  name listed 3 times, others had it listed as many as 10 times.

Then, using a very scientific method (www.random.org) I inputted that list and pushed the magic “sort my list in a random order” button.

And look who came up as Numero Uno . . .

Big Fat Congrats to Beckles from Foresight Is So Often Blind!

She’s been dying to try these little slices of heaven since May, so I was really chuffed that she came out on top.  Hope she won’t be disappointed.

Okay.  So that’s it for today.  I’m uber busy at work and at home.  Why?  Because I’m getting ready to go on vacation next week!  Nowhere exotic, just up north to a friend’s cottage for a few days then relaxing around our pool.  Fingers crossed that the Weather Gods treat us right.

I’ll be unplugged for most of the time, so you might not hear much from me.  Don’t be alarmed.  I’m quite sure that spending every.waking.hour with the boys for a full week will produce some stories worth telling.

Au Revoir Lovelies!

Also, if you haven’t entered my Great Canadian Butter Tart Giveaway, then you should.  But you only have until 6pm EST today (Wed July 14/10) to get on it – chop chop.

Okay, now to get on with my story . . .

I live in the suburbs.  The neighbours on one side of us have a pool, a hot tub and 2 teen-aged kids.  We’re not particularly friendly with them.  Well, its not that we’re UN-friendly, it’s just that they kinda keep to themselves.  As do we.  Which is quite fine!  We’ll give each other the mandatory polite smile and head nod if we should find ourselves out front of our houses at the same time.  We’ve spoken on a few occasions when it involved changes to our properties that we felt the other should be advised of.  But that’s about it.

That being said, my boys kick balls against our adjoining fence EVERY. BLOODY. DAY.  Thump.  Thump.  Thump . . . it NEVER ends.  I swear I hear that sound in my sleep.  And every day, a ball – or two – end up OVER the adjoining fence.

Our neighbours are kind enough to just toss them back over the next time they are in their backyard.  Over the years, I’ve apologized for this.  Willie has apologized for this.  I’ve had the boys apologize for this.  And we thank them when the opportunity arises.

Fortunately they just chuckle about it and point to their own kids and it’s understood that they have also “been there”.  Since they’re often away on the weekends, they have indicated that if their back gate isn’t locked, the boys can just run around and grab the ball(s) if necessary.

But when a hand-held sized water balloon that my boys were tossing went over the fence on Saturday night, in the dark, I couldn’t just let it go.

I had visions of the little thing floating around the surface of their above ground pool until it was grabbed by the skimmer hole, forced down into the basket where it would block the flow of water, thus burning out their pump and causing considerable, expensive damage.

Have I ever mentioned that I can be a little OCD sometimes?

This was one of those times.  Panic set in.  Destructive visions danced around my head.  My ears were on high alert for odd pool filter noises.  I knew there would be no sleep that night until the situation was resolved.

So I told Willie “you’re going to have to go over there and get it”.

To which he replied “It’s fine.  Nothing’s going to happen.  I’m not going over.”

Which I took to mean “do it yourself”.

And so I did.  And thus my search & rescue mission was born . . .

Armed with a flashlight, I headed next door.  Rang the door bell.  Noted that the interior of the house was in darkness.  Waited.  And waited.  No answer.  No car in driveway.  Clearly the occupants were not home.

I go around to the side gate.  It’s pulled closed but not locked.  So I enter.

I scour the yard near the fence for the water balloon.  “It was kinda in that direction” the boys say as they attempt to guide me.  But it’s not on the ground.  Ha!  Just as I suspected – it MUST have landed in the pool.  Thank God for me.

I shine the flashlight on their pool and begin to systematically check all areas of its surface.  No balloon.  It MUST be in the skimmer basket as I had feared!  I hope I’m not too late . . .

I head to the back corner of their yard where the skimmer is located and try to peek in.  This proves to be difficult.  It would be easier to remove the lid and look in .  Lid is stuck.  Can’t remove it.  Damn.  What next?

Just then their bright security light in the backyard comes on.  Crap!

It’s at that moment, with my eyes temporary blinded by the security light, that I notice the teen-aged son has come out onto their back step.  BUSTED!  The lazy bugger must have been sleeping when I rang the bell!

“Oh hi!  It’s just me, Cher, from next door” I awkwardly explain (in case he had a gun or a baseball bat)

But it’s not just the teen-aged son.  Behind him I notice the parents.  Who have clearly JUST arrived home and found someone with a flashlight prowling around their backyard.

And so my nervous, busted rambling begins . . .

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.  No one answered when I rang the door bell.  But you see the boys accidentally put a ball over the fence again, but its a really small one, and it floats, and um, they thought it landed in your pool and um, I was really worried that it’d end up in your skimmer and damage your equipment . . . ”

At this point I notice that it is strangely quiet over the fence at my own backyard.  And that my guys have ran into our house like a flock of nervous girls and left me out there on my own to dig myself out of this embarrassing hole – nice.

“Anyway, I don’t seem to see it in there, so I think it’s okay.  ha ha.  Really sorry.”

And then I leave.  Without really giving them a chance to say anything.  Trying to walk calmly and slowly back to my own house like it was no big deal.  When in actuality, my heart was pounding and my face was red and I was totally embarrassed that I had been caught.

I know they were probably thing “WTH???  Does she come over here every time we’re out?  Should we believe her story or was she up to no good?”

Somehow, I’d like to blame this on Willie.

Ever been caught red-handed doing something sneaky?  Will I ever be able to look them in the eye again?  Do you want to win butter tarts?

I have a few items to go through before we get to the real reason you’re probably here . . .

First, we had another International Office Tour on Friday! (that’s right folks, its not too late to do yours.  Just look at the long list on my sidebar over on the right – are you feeling left out?  Then get on it!)  My favourite jewelery designer & army wife, Allyson from Magnolias & Mimosas, coughed up the goods.  Be sure to check her’s out right here.  Don’t let the glass head put you off.

Next, I had the opportunity to hang out in Chicago on Saturday!  Okay, well maybe not so much “hang out” but more like “was featured” over at A Modern Day Ricky and Lucy.  I wrote a post about a few of the things new Moms of boys should watch out for.  See?  I’m entertaining AND educational.  Check it out here.  Or else.

Next, I’ve added a “Subscribe” button over on my sidebar.  Due to an overly busy life recently, and not wanting summer to pass me by while I’ve got my head stuck over a keyboard, I’m currently trying to post on a Monday / Wednesday / Friday schedule.  I figure that’s better than not posting at all.  Or is it?  Whatever.  So if you’re not using a Blog Reader, and you get tired of clicking your bookmark to my site all the time and coming up disappointed when there isn’t a new post there waiting for you, this is the button for you!  Simply add your email address and hit subscribe.  Then, Feedburner will send you a confirmation email.  Once you confirm, they will email my posts right to your In-Box on the day I post them!  That’s some sweet service!  You can also cancel your subscription whenever you want.  But what loser would want to do that?!

And finally, we get to the celebration giveaway!

This is officially my 200th post!  I started blogging back in August of 2009 and can’t believe it’s been 200 already.  I either really like writing, or I really need a way to ignore my family.  Regardless, I think it’s cause for celebration!  Which is why I’ve decide to award one of you with a little piece of me.  That’s right folks!  I’m giving away Butter Tarts!

Many of you might remember that I blogged about this Canadian delicacy back in May.  You were very curious and rightfully devasted that these little darlings could not be purchased in other countries.  So, here’s the deal – the winner will receive 1 pack (I believe there’s 6 in a pack) of my favourite ones delivered right to their door!  Huh?!  Huh!?  Has THAT ever been done before???

Now, I feel that I need to add a few caveats . . .

1)  I can not guarantee what condition they’ll show up in.  I’ll pack them well and cough up large for a quick reliable delivery service, but shit happens.

2)  I hope that the quick reliable delivery service can get them to you while they’re still fresh.  But again, no guarantees.

3)  I have no control over the beasts at the Canadian, or any other country’s, Customs Department.  In fact, I’m not even sure I’m allowed to send food across the border.  So if it doesn’t work out, I’ll send you something else.  It’s the chance you’ll have to take.

4)  Although I’m SURE you’ll love them as much as I do, this also can not be guaranteed.

So, if you’re interested, here’s how you earn entries;

• simply leave me a comment today – 1
• be a member of this site using Google Friend Connect – 2
• subscribe to me via email (with the swanky new button) or in a Reader – 2
• follow me on Twitter – 2
• Tweet this giveaway – 2 entries per time (please include @theonlygirlcher so I know you did)

And, for those of you that left me a comment on Friday’s post BEFORE today, I did promise you’d be looked upon favourably.  Which means you automatically get 1 extra entry if you leave me a comment for today’s contest.  Kinda like a “I’ll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today” thing.

Now, since I never understand that whole “leave one comment for each entry thing”, you don’t have to do that.  Just leave me ONE comment detailing all the requirements you meet and the total entries you feel you’ve earned.  Good?

Contest closes Wednesday July 14th, 2010 at 6pm EST.

I’ll use some kind of random selection thingie, or maybe the boys will do a draw.  Haven’t thought that far ahead yet.

Winner to be announced here on Friday, July 16th.

Okay . . . GO!

*UPDATE:  This contest is now closed.  Winner to be announced Friday July 16/10.

Okay, maybe not so much lazy, as busy.

In fact, maybe not so much busy, as hectic.

You see, my 9 to 5 gig that pays a bunch of bills is still exploding.

And Willie was out of town on business (AGAIN!  why is it never me?) which left me to single-mom it each evening.

And I had to write a guest post for an appearance I’m making over the weekend.

Oh, and we’ve been having a heat wave up here which leaves me wanting to do nothing but lay in the pool by the time I do get home from the god forsaken soccer fields each night.

So, with all those excuses made that said, I am here to make all you good Readers an offer.

IF you should elect to return on Monday - which will be my 200th post (woot woot!) – I shall be having a celebratory giveaway.  Something that I believe has never been done before in the history of the world on any of the blogs I read.  And even if it has been done before, it doesn’t matter because it will still be worth your while.

Curious yet?

Alright then.  See you Monday.

P.S.  Those of you that leave nice comments today will be looked upon favourably in Monday’s contest.  Not that I’m gonna play favourites or anything, but I’m just saying.  It may or may not help your case.  Are you willing to take that chance?  I thought not.

Laters.

We ordered Chinese food the other night.

At the end of my meal I decided to enjoy a fortune cookie.  For one, I find them to be very yummy.  For two, I believe that they are relatively low in calories (if you have any evidence to the contrary, please keep it to yourself).  And for three, I like the little fortunes.  Strange and quirky?  Sure.  But harmless fun in the comfort of your own home nonetheless.

This was my fortune:

“Ask not what your fortune cookie can do for you but what you can do for your fortune cookie.”

So here’s the question – What the HELL do you suppose THAT is supposed to mean!?!?

Naturally I couldn’t help but contemplate it all weekend . . .

Is it something so deep that my low intelligence is simply not able to grasp it?

Have I been looking at fortune cookies completely wrong all these years?

Is it merely an Asian factory worker trying to pull a fast one on me?

Are fortune cookies actually made in the US by JFK fans?

Please submit your thoughts immediately.  This mystery must be solved.

Willie has some very similar socks.  They look like this:

At which point, we have a conversation that went something like this:

Willie:  Why are you wearing my socks?

Me:  I’m not.

Willie:  Yes you are.

Me:  No, these are mine.

Willie:  No, those are MY socks.

Me:  First of all, I’m a women’s size 7.  You’re a man’s size 11.  I think I would know if the socks I were wearing fit me or not.

Willie:  Those are mine.

Me:  Secondly, mine are very short.  Yours go up on your ankle about an inch or two.  See these ones?  Very short.  Mine.

Willie:  (doing his best to be annoying) Nope, they’re mine.

Me:  (growing more annoyed)  How would you know?!  Did you buy these socks?

Willie:  No.

Me:  No, that’s right!  I bought these socks.  In fact, have you EVER bought yourself socks?  Or underwear for that matter?

Willie:  No.

Me:  Right then.  Trust me when I say these are MY socks.

Then I got to thinking . . . it IS always me who buys the socks and underwear in this house!  And before me, it was his Mom (in fact, it’s often STILL his Mom because he likes a particular kind of underwear that can only be bought in Britain and she travels there once or twice a year and brings some back for him).

Me:  Have you EVER bought yourself socks or underwear?

Willie:  No.

Me:  You’re a grown man.  You’re in your late 30’s.  Don’t you think it’s about time you did??? 

Willie:  makes a feeble attempt to ignore me . . .

Me:  In fact, I’m going to take the boys shopping this weekend so THEY can buy their own.  Let’s break this cycle early, shall we?

Willie:  They don’t have any money.

Me:  Then I’ll give them some.  Then I’ll take them to the Mall and tell them to use it to buy themselves socks and underwear.  It’ll be for their own good.

Willie:  Ah . . . they’re not going to like that very much.

He’s probably right.

Does your husband/boyfriend buy his own socks & underwear or are we creating a society of Mamma’s Boys???  I’m launching a campaign to stop this madness – who’s in?

And then this weekend happened.  And all hell broke loose in Toronto.  And it was no longer funny.

The city had been preparing for the worst, but we all thought it was overkill.

We were wrong.

Unfortunately the peaceful and legitimate protests of many were marred by the violent and criminal behaviour of a few.

I spent most of the weekend glued to the TV where they showed live coverage around the clock.

Our city was transformed into something we have never seen in this country;

• Rioting
• Looting
• Vandalism
• Over 900 arrests in 48 hours
• Tear gas & gas masks
• Police in full riot gear MARCHING through the streets

Sights that some other far away countries probably experience every day, but one I hope not to see in my country anytime soon.

Elle reported that she walked past much of the damage on her way to work this morning, and that people in the downtown core are still shaking their heads in disbelief.

So, instead of laughing at a photo shopped picture of me this morning, I urge you to view the pictures in this link.  And be thankful we don’t live like this everyday.